where are you?

do you know the feeling of anxiety? the feeling of agony? bet you do....

who am I anyway? I don't know myself anymore.. it's awkward, I don't know this Rolf anymore, where is Rolf anyway? did he run away? did I do something to scare him? did I hurt him? it feels like I'm losing him..

I'm losing him..

I wanna cry, but my eyes are dry.. I wanna shout but.. I bet our neighbors will kill me if I did.. There's another person entering my brain.. whoever it might be, I'm beginning to lose my memory.. little by little, even the thoughts of Rolf, I'm losing it. all of it..

who is this?
I need help...

Rolf is dying inside, I know I can feel it.. the unknown entity is trying to steal my whole being..

it's starting again..
it'll begun in a smile.. then it will make me do whatever it desires..

I'm afraid..... Rolf is dying.. I don't wanna see him like this, seems like he's in total pain..
Rolf, I'm sorry.. if I could save you I will... I will...
but I promise I won't let you die, I won't let it, take youuuu..
you are me.. and I am you.. we are one..

(Rolf, I need you so please stay by my side... if I don't have you then I think I can't survive `cause I won't have anyone to talk to... )

God, please help me.. I need you, I'm changing and I need you.. guide me. T___T