when things like this happen.

you know that i idolize paramore, right? and i don't only idolize them -- I freakin` love them! the LOVE you feel when you LOVE someone. this someone is my role model HAYLEY WILLIAMS, which is the reason i am able to cope with everything when i was younger. lol. but anyway i happen to stumble upon a group -- okay, i mean a BAND here in the Philippines that has the "merely hayley wannabe" vocalist and i dislike her. Ghad. am i this bad of a person? i felt really bad because she is this close to being hayley and i am here -- siting in front of the computer watching them on youtube. tsk. i wish i had a band that is composed of 3 guitar players (lead guitar,bass guitar and rhytmn guitar), 1 player for the drums and me as the vocalist/keyboardist/songwriter. but this is impossible now, is it not? i will be 19 years old this september and  will be 20 next year.. i will be too old. too old to be part of a band.

i am just so ashamed that i do not have this kind of bandmates that are very hardworking and have the ability to adapt to everyone. tsk. it's just sad to have shattered dreams! :(

so so so so sad.

as in SAD!

very SAD!

PS: makalagot jud kaayo kay naa na silay album na-suya jud ko na ambot. lol. but anyway.. pasagdaan nalang.. i focus nalang nako akong life sa akong pagka VEGAN ug sa akong WALKING EXCERCISES plus maybe i will study songwriting and stuff just to be happy plus, i will write books and will become an architect someday! so i better study now!

pero sayang.
if maye i can change somethings in the past.
maybe just maybe i am the one who she'll watch in the computer screen
i will be the one to sing in front of a big stage.
 anyway

life happens.
isipon nalang nato na there is a reason for all of this.

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that is all for todays blog. :)